Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Newsflash

Urgh! Coldplay are coming to South Africa.

"Oh no! It's.... Coldplay!"

Probably the vilest alternative rock outfit to ever crawl out of the grey graininess of the Queen’s country – yes, sadly folks, Coldplay will be hitting our shores in early October.

With them set to play no less than 2 shows on their first trip to Africa, I’m sure there will be no need to rush to get tickets.
Ok, I’ll admit that may be a little optimistic on my part, but if it were up to me, they’d have to call off this leg of the tour because of a lack of interest.

I once had some amount of respect for the 4 twats out of London. But that very quickly vanished into thin air when I witnessed this shocking performance at the 2006 Grammy Award ceremony. A piss-poor, flat vocal performance by Chris Martin (who, in my humble opinion, must have been drugged out of his mind – but that's no excuse).

You are most welcome to form your own opinion by watching that exact performance here…

No need to state the obvious to you, but I will be keeping my hard-earned Rands and cents firmly secured in my wallet for this one.
If you choose to subject yourself to a wail –fest that will be almost entirely attended by post-pubescent girls, yearning to relive their once eventful teenage years by reminiscing about dorky, poetic, pathetic Chris Martin with every one of her 7 high-school bbf’s all screaming at the top of their lungs hoping to catch a drop of sweat by jumping up and down on their spiky, toe crushing high heels, here are the concert details:

Cape Town
Wednesday, 5 October, 2011
Cape Town Stadium
Tickets from R270 to R635

Johannesburg
Saturday, 8 October, 2011
FNB Stadium Johannesburg
Tickets from R270 to R635

Tickets are available from Computicket tomorrow (Thursday, 12 May 2011) – but don’t say I didn’t warn you.
 
On an interesting side-note:
I stumbled upon an article from 2008 which states that Joe Satriani claimed Coldplay stole the melody to his song "I wish I could fly". I'm not saying any more than that - but watch the video to make up your own mind... {take note of the quotes}


 The exact same Tempo, the exact same Metre, same chord progressions, even Satriani's solo was copied as the melody line. They stole the song, and the Rat Bastards avoided public humiliation by settling out of court. Slimy, unoriginal Rat Bastards!!!


\m/

1 comment:

  1. I agree wholeheartedly with your assessment of this band, they make me want to stab sharp objects in my ears to avoid listening to their (not-even-original) brand of whiney drivel. Needless to say, I will also NOT be attending their shows.

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