In a Sick State

I’ve been alluding and hinting towards this post for some time now. Even more annoying is the fact that the idea for it has been mulling around in my head since the U2 concert...

 SA Rock Music - Inspiration to the Police & German car manufacturers alike

I need to get some things straight right off the bat: Although I would love to claim that I know all the ins-and-outs of the South African (rock) music scene, I honestly don’t. Now, you can easily debate that it is my fault – what with the enormous amounts of info available on the web – I suppose an argument can be made that it is up to me to get the info I’m looking for. But the other side of that coin is that effective marketing should reach its target audience. I am that audience – why then am I still in the dark?

I suffer from no illusions here. I am totally aware that Metal and Rock (to a certain extent) are underground genres. And I admit freely that I am not in clubs and venues as often as I should be. That being said, however, my perception is that the harder side of the local music scene is quite ill.

I intend to make a few compelling arguments here...

Let me get started by saying that The Springbok Nude Girls sucked at U2. Come to think of it, they sucked at My Coke Fest 2006 too. Arno Carstens even sucked as the opening act for R.E.M when they were here in 2005. [This was during his ‘adult contemporary’ phase as a solo artist]. Does that mean that The Nudies suck full-stop? Or does that mean that they just suck live?



Arno Carstens may harm your computer - must be true, Google says so!



I’ll say this: A few days after the Coke Fest in 2006, I happened to hear a radio interview with Arno in which he complained that the local acts were forced to perform in the daytime, with little or no lighting and at half the capabilities of the huge sound system.

Fair complaint? Perhaps. Or perhaps you could get off your local-celebrity ass and work harder to gain international acclaim, Arno. Remember a band called Saron Gas? If memory serves me, they were at the 2006 festival too [albeit under a different name]. Difference is that Shaun and the boys worked their fingers to the bone to get to where they are, to enjoy the resources of an international quality sound and lighting system, at full strength. Present a show that people will want to see if you plan to be on the bill at a huge event like that.



Shaun Morgan of Seether, Live @ My Coke Fest 2006



I’ve strayed off topic...

The sound was lousy, the performance was poor and un-entertaining, and with the band from deepest, darkest Africa, I expected much more from this once, proudly heavy, band. This was also supposed to be The Nudies’ big return from hiatus, and what better platform to cock it up than at U2 - the biggest concert in South Africa to date?



Sprinkbok Nude Girls in the "Glory Days"

Why am I so abrasive towards them? I am a huge Nudies fan – I think Bubblegum on my boots is one of the very best rock singles, anywhere, ever. The most recent single from the reformed Nudies is the quite forgettable Illuminate, off the 2007 Peace Breaker album - hardly worth the mention.

But where have the glory days gone? The days of Genie and Blue Eyes. The days when The Nudies had some of the most loyal, most hardcore fans? I’ll tell you – they are gone; relegated to the cold dark abyss of yesterday.

Speaking of, where are all the heavy bands? A few that spring to mind are: Battery 9, [that turned into “9”, and fell off the wagon soon after], Grannysmith, Perez, Cutting Jade, Sugar Drive and, not that heavy but worth a mention, Just Jinger [or Jinjer, or Ginger, or however they spell it nowadays] In fact, the only ass-kicking, heavy band that hails from local shores I can think of is The Narrow...

[If you can think of any others, please let me know by dropping a line in the ‘Comments’ below – if they deserve it, they will definitely get a mention...]

...come to think of it, that’s not entirely true. The Afrikaans boys seem to be making major inroads to the local scene.

[Disclaimer: I’ve now entered into territory I know nothing about...]

There seems to be a new Afrikaans rock band around every corner these days – and that’s not a bad thing. Some of these guys can hold a candle right up to any one of the Soutie-bands from this country, and rightfully so.

Look, in essence, music knows no language - and since I can speak both English and Afrikaans equally deliciously, it shouldn’t matter to me, right? Well it does. For reasons I cannot comprehend entirely, I just don’t like Afrikaans rock.

To me, a song is a complete package consisting of many different parts – instruments, beat, tempo, etc. And the biggest aversion (amongst many) I have to Afrikaans rock is the cadence and metre in the lyrics. I just can’t wrap my head around it. It sounds strange and ‘offish’ to my ears. The instruments are as good as any I have heard, and more often than not, they come together in glorious fashion. But, the lyrics just seem ‘off’ – nothing I can do to change that. And how much international success will they ever enjoy if they sing in a language spoken only by 6.5 million people worldwide?

Another thing that gripes me about the Afrikaans boys is that their patriarchs are inbreeds. Don’t believe me? Exasperated by that comment? Suck on this then...

The 4 best selling and best known Afrikaans rock bands are:

1. Fokofpolisiekar

Fokofpolisiekar (Live)

2. Van Coke Kartel

Van Coke Kartel

3. Die Heuwels Fantasties

Die Heuwels Fantasties

4. aKING

aKING

They often play the same festivals and when they do, they call themselves “VanFokKingTasties” – very clever indeed.



Francois Badenhorst-Van Coke... Ugly!



Now, Francois Badenhorst was with Fokof before he started Van Coke, and became Francois Van Coke. Wynand Myburg was also part of the Polisie, but gave that up to do Coke. Justin Kruger is a past member of both bands. Then, Hunter Kennedy left the Kartel to go play in the Hills (Heuwels), and took Johnny de Ridder with him. Jaco Venter is the only member of the family that plays in the only predominantly English (and not-so-very-inbred) band of the bunch, namely aKING. [Sjo... should I draw you a map?]

All are very good musos, all have honed their craft, and all have done their time in studio - I’ll never take that away from them. But is this inbreeding indicative of a bigger problem? I think so...



The Parlotones - with a hint of red

By my observation, the talent pool in this country is slowly running dry. I believe that this country has fallen into the hole of rewarding mediocrity – take the Parlotones as an example... A bold statement to make, and one that I can’t get into right now... [I’ll explore this in-depth on a later post, so for now, just take my word for it]

Does the Dutchies’ inbreeding stem from a lack of like-minded muso’s to form similar but different bands with? I think it’s not only possible, but highly likely.

The palate of the average South African does not appreciate Hard Rock & Heavy Metal – no problem, because “...to each their own...”. What I do have a problem with is this; there is (currently) no heavy band I know of that can satisfy the appetite of us, the metal fans. South Africa has a very small music industry, and last in line of that already too small industry are all the ‘heavy’ genres. Therefore I understand, but will never condone, the fact that there is more money to be made in the pop scene. As an aspiring professional musician myself, I completely understand the need to make a living. And for many, that means turning to mainstream, radio-friendly, pop and rock to put bread on the table. That’s just sad! To think that we cannot establish a hardcore scene in SA because we, the consumers, do not support our local talent...

So, here is my call to arms: If you enjoy rock and metal, and you want to be able to see local bands of high calibre in your neighbourhood club and opening for the big international acts that hit our shores from time to time – go out and make the effort. Go see bands play live, pay the cover charge with a smile; buy the T Shirt or flag or whatever merchandise the band has on offer, “Like” them on Facebook and invite your friends along to gigs. And most important: PAY FOR THEIR CD!

The only way we can encourage the muso’s and bands out there to never give up is to give them the opportunity. By spending your hard-earned cash on legitimate goods, you create a bigger market for the up –and-comers to make a living of the music they love to produce, and we would love to listen to...

\m/

U2 - 360°, Live in Johannesburg

You’ll excuse me, I’m sure - but to give full disclosure and a deeper understanding of what the entire experience was like to me I’ll have to spend some time beating around the bush before I get to the actual crux of this post [and that crux is not the actual concert].

 It’s Sunday, 13 February 2011 and the big day has arrived. It’s U2 day! And I couldn’t be more excited.

Since the concert was being held at FNB Stadium (or Soccer City if you prefer), Big Concerts pulled out all the stops for this one. Utilising the FULL of infrastructure built and used for the Fifa World Cup, including the Metro Rail system, Bus Rapid Transit, park & rides and in fact, the whole 9 yards.
Now, this being a 3rd world country, it was a welcome surprise to see the mass of people (official attendance of 94,232) being herded without any major hick-ups, and all getting into the stadium on time. Make no mistake, there were hordes of people. But, as far as I could see, everyone was excited, and having a good time. So big-up to Big Concerts and all involved for getting the behind-the-scenes part spot on!

It seems like I say this very often, but I’ll say it again... I’m not the world’s biggest U2 fan, and defiantly not a big enough fan to pay R 2,654 for a Golden Circle ticket. So when I got tickets for the “cheap seats” I was actually quite chuffed! Bear in mind that we had been to Rammstein the Friday, had the Muppet’s birthday celebration the Saturday, and got up early on ‘U2 Day’ so I was quite looking forward to watching the concert from my bird’s eye view, in a plastic, orange seat high-up in the stands.

Inside the Metro Train with all the other whities

Since we were meeting family in Centurion, we decided that we’d board a Metro train at Centurion Station. I’ve never seen so many whities on any form of public transport, much less a train. So out of the ordinary was the sight, that we had onlookers totally dumbstruck. At every station we stopped, the regular commuters were in awe of these (mostly) middle-class, white folk, armed to the teeth with booze of every variety, acting quite rowdy on their trains.

Life saving beer-can holding the door open for some fresh air

The 2½ hour train ride there was quite pleasurable, everyone was excited, and we even took turns smoking outside, between the coaches. We passed through Jo’burg CBD on our way to FNB Stadium, and saw some strange and derelict sites – it’s a different world to the image they present to you about the inner city. And I must admit, I had a moment or two of quite reflection about the privileged position I held to be on my way to a stadium concert as opposed to the utter poverty I witnessed on the ride there...

FNB Stadium

Coming around the corner at Nasrec, the majestic stadium lay before us like a homing beacon, and all avid photographers rushed to the side of the train to forever immortalise that moment on film (or memory stick). Arriving at the train station, I swear you could feel the electricity in the air. I can’t believe anyone there was not excited. That’s one thing I can say about the Pop-enthusiast, in their hordes, they are loyal to the end. There were thousands of people, of every colour and creed, all seemingly bursting at the seams to see the world’s most celebrated band live.

Thousands of people making their way into the stadium...

Inside the "Calabash"

Having arrived at the Soccer City stadium, we started making our way into the stadium area and to our seats. I was dumb-struck, seeing that brobdingnagian structure from the inside for the first time was truly a moment that made me proudly South African. This did not pass by the Muppet either, her comment being along the lines of “It looks like something out of Battlestar Galactica.”

"The Claw" as seen from our seats

Arriving at our seats, the immensity struck us like a low-flying brick! Words cannot describe the feeling of grandeur and insignificance all at the same time... The 40-odd metre high stage, aptly named “The Claw” was standing like a huge mechanical spider above the field – ready to spring to life at any second – most impressive! Even more impressive was the massive line array speaker system. From my seat, I counted 450 separate speakers and subs. Now that’s huge!!! I later read that this is the largest speaker system collection in touring history. [Follow this link for a full write-up about the sound system: http://clairglobal.com/u2/]

The dusk African skyline over FNB Stadium

As light started fading, and scores of people flooded the stadium, my anticipation was reaching breaking-point. Though not my favourite band, I simply couldn’t wait to see what all the fuss in the press was about. I wouldn’t dare say anything bad about the machine that is U2. Even though I despise the politically motivated, 3rd world defending, tax evading, Bono, and can’t even tell you the name of the drummer... [Larry Mullen – thanks to Google] - The Edge truly is a magical guitarist. Thanks to his signature playing style and tone, I have the world’s respect for him.

Amandou & Mariam performing live

There was a roar from the crowd, and as I looked up I saw something happening on the stage. A group, which was totally unfamiliar to me, took up their instruments and continued to play an inaudible din. I was to find out only later that they are called “Amadou & Marriam”, a musical duo from Mali. There is no doubt in my mind that this was Bono himself doing his bit to promote African music - and props to him for doing so. But, why then, not consider a local band with African flavour like Freshly Ground, or even Malaika? Guaranteed to get a better response from the crowd, and guaranteed to strike a heart-string with the locals.

Mind-boggling clock that doesn't tell the time

Drawing ever closer to the start, the analogue clock on the screens caught my eye. Being 100% lucid, and not under the influence of any controlled substances whatsoever, the clock didn’t seem to be counting down correctly. Eventually the dials “fell off” and the concert got underway with an earth-shaking roar of approval from the almost 100,000 strong crowd.
... and suddenly, I got it! I understood the hype, I got why they booked-out FNB Stadium, why every single “entertainment correspondent” from every single TV show, radio station, newspaper and magazine were singing the praises of the 360° Tour!

The concert in full-swing

IT WAS AWE INSPIRING!!!


The band walked on from behind the monolithic stage and utter chaos ensued. The golden circle was ecstatic, and I probably would’ve been too if I could get within spitting distance of Bono [and foot-kissing distance from The Edge]
The set-list was completely predictable, but this did not take away from the spectacle in the slightest. They played all the old hits, as well as some of the songs from the No line on the horizon album (of which the tour is in support of). A very pleasant and unsuspected surprise was when “Bra” Hugh Masakela was called up onstage to play the trumpet on I still haven’t found what I’m looking for. An absolutely mind-blowing performance from the custodian of Jazz in this country. Sunday Bloody Sunday is my favourite U2 single by miles, but the version of Still haven’t found with Hugh gave me that patriotic feeling the residents in Pretoria get when the Bulls win the Curry Cup. To me nothing after that even mattered!


I was quite surprised with the political aspect of the show, which we all knew was inevitable. Not with the content as much as the duration. With the South African struggle still fresh in our minds, Bono had numerous figureheads and subject matter to choose from. Surprisingly enough, they opted to go for a speech by Archbishop Desmond Tutu about the “One” campaign and not for some arcane liberation speech by Nelson ‘Madiba’ Mandela. I’m very happy to report that this part of the concert was short lived, and they soon got on with the real reason we were there – the music.

There were quite a few gimmicks that I picked-up on... Video of a live cross-over to the International Space Station, The Desmond Tutu speech, snap shots of Nelson Mandela, moveable bridges that went over the heads of the golden-circle groupies, more political themed videos, etc.




Stage with big-screen fully extended

 To my mind the saving grace of the show was, not necessarily the actual musical performance, but the stage design, lighting, and (to make special mention) the humongous, movable big screen! At one point, the screen expands, and stretches down about 25 metres from its original position – truly amazing.
I would be neglecting my (self-chosen) duties if I did not say anything about the lighting. Or perhaps, I shouldn’t say anything at all, but leave you with a picture of what I’m referring to...

Huge mirror-ball on top of the stage - blindingly spectacular

All said and done, and with minimal criticism, the show was awesome! Everything surrounding the actual live on-stage performance was pretty good too – and it all came together to give me a goose-bump experience when I think back on it now...

Everything except for the Springbok Nude Girls...